![]() And the antagonist is a hot, angry girl in a miniskirt. The main characters are a brash youth with no voice and stupid hair and his aggressively cute monkey friend, voiced by some painfully shrill Harpy thing. But that's where the internationalism ends if you find the Japanese offensive, then you'll find this game offensively Japanese. Now it's Capcom's turn to take a wholehearted, two-footed bounce on that poor, defiled body with Zack & Wiki, an adventure game for the Wii featuring Western-style point-and-click controls and inventory puzzles. Attempts are constantly made to revive the genre by jumping on its gas-bloated stomach, but this rarely causes more than a feeble squirt of pungent fluids from one of the less wholesome orifices. Not that adventure game fans have ever been able to accept that. So the genre popped its unintuitive clogs. ![]() For every decent adventure game, like Monkey Island or Grim Fandango, there were five excess-baggage-fests driven by moon logic, funnily enough all designed by Roberta Williams. Most of your average adventure game experience was spent carting a truckload of miscellaneous knick-knacks around, patiently rubbing them all one by one against everything else in the hope of hopping on to the train of logic unique to the game's designer. ![]() Some blame the aggressive expansion of neighboring first-person shooter tribes, but personally I think it's more to do with the fact that most of them were shit. This shy, thoughtful tribe was known for its great storytelling tradition, and ruled the great PC Gaming Plains for many years before mysteriously dying out around the onset of the Quake Era. Long ago, in the mists of time, when main characters didn't need to have biceps bigger than their faces and when bump mapping was just something cartographers did to their wives, there lived adventure games. ![]()
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